JJ'snetwork.moc Players Presents

The Friday Night Theater Special : The Robes of Justice 

Thursday May 4th... 4:18 PM

Case File # 007JB08  The People vs. Doctor P. Nobody of the DFA

Court cop: All rise please for the honorable judge JJ...

Judge: Beseated.

So BH it is good to have you back in my courtroom. It has been awhile. Call your witness please.

BH: For the record sir I'd like to make a statement?

Judge: Sure, make it quick.

BH: This court and room and process is a farse your honor!

Judge: That will be just about enough BH! One more outburst and I'll hold you in comtempt of court down in the browse area. Now get on with it and call your witness. I have a hotel room to get to...

BH: The people call to the stand Dr. P. Nobody of the Dumb F.... Association

Court cop: Turn and raise your right hand please.

Doc. P. What the hell for? I'm not allowed to say anything other then what they told me to say!

Court cop: OH...Okay.

Judge: Take your seat then Doc and you will, answer the questions!

Doc P.: Yeah whatever.

BH: You know we are going to get into it rather quickly here don't you Doc?

Doc P.: You think so do ya?

BH: Judge! Permission to treat the witness as hostile?

Judge: Hey...knock yourself out BH!

BH: For the record Doc how long have you been with the DFA?

Doc P.: Bout...well let me see now... 25 no...ummm 28 years I guess.

BH: And during this time, what was your job there with the FDA...OPPS sorry DFA?

Judge: Court reporter. You will strike that from the record and jury I am instructing you to disregard that as you did not hear that!

In unison.

Jury:  Hear what judge?

Judge:  Man oh man I knew this day was going to be a long one. Continue BH!

BH:  Doc tell us what your job was there.

Doc P.:  You tell me yours first.

BH: I am the one asking the questions here you Gneuf!!

Judge: Gneuf...That's a good one BH.

BH: What is your job...sir?

Doc.P.: To keep all the BS under wraps.

BH: What BS would you be referring to?

Doc.P.: The difference between what people know or think they know and what actually goes on.

BH: Goes on where exactly?

Doc.P. In the hospitals, OR's, offices, medical buildings... and OH ya the labs especially.

BH: About what?

Doc.P.: About what...what?

BH: About all the BS that goes on in those areas.

Doc P.: WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME!!!

BH: The TRUTH of course!

Doc P. : YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH !!!

BH: Just answer the questions! Did doctors Warburg & Brewer not show and prove that cancer cells could be produced by reducing the oxygen by 35% to that cell? YES or NO!

Doc P. : Yes

BH: So if the oxygen is reduced by 35% for ...what, a 48 hour period is it?

Doc P.: Yeap, there abouts.

BH: Do the research labs today studying cancer create tissue samples using the exact same method?

Doc P.: I am taking the 5th!

Judge: Sorry Doc but president Tush just got rid of the 5th amendment in the name of homeland security... So HA! Now answer the damn question!

BH: Do research labs use this same method of oxygen reduction to create samples to use in their studies?

Doc P.: YES!...Yes they do.

BH: And is it not true that to sterilize research areas and kill off samples after they are done using those samples, that they turn up the oxygen back to or close to 100%?

Defence Attorney

DA: OBJECTION! ...objection your honor!

Judge: Objection to what?

DA: Welllll.... don't you think that's a little incriminating?

Judge: NO kiddin! Now sit your butt down and shut up or I'll plaster all those pictures of you and that little blonde all over the Gallery. Now you are here only to make a buck and that you have!

The DA quickly raises his right hand to his lips and motioned to zipper his mouth shut and tossed away the key while slowly sitting down.

BH: Do they or do they not sterilize work areas and kill off used samples of cancer cells and tissue by turning up the oxygen to 100%

Doc P.: LOOK... THERE'S TOO MUCH money at stack. It isn't just that simple.

BH: YES or NO Doc?

Doc P.: Yes they do...That is exactly what they do

BH: Does the high level of oxygen kill all cancer cells?

Doc P.: YES!

BH: And is it not true that this occurs in roughly 2 hours for a fist size tumor?

Doc P.: So I've heard

BH: Turns it to dust in fact does it not?

In a sinister unhuman little chuckle

Doc P.: Yes you fool...YES!

BH: Your honor I REST my case and believe this gneuf should be sent up the river without a paddle.... or a boat or even a life preserver....

Judge: I agree...One charge right?

BH: Yes your honor

Judge: Good...Three life terms, back to back to back to be done standing on your head...

Down comes the gavel...SMACK!

And the lights fade out....

I sincerely hope that it is as funny to read as it was to write...

Sincerely

AL

PS BUT hey if not let me hear about it...

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