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Questions To Ask Before Ending A Relationship
Posted On 08/13/2008 08:54:17 by ashy5six

Romantic Relationship whether in courtship or marriage, could be very interesting or enjoyable for some people and can also be frustrating for some other people. Whichever side of the balance you found yourselves as couples or partners in a relationship would depend first and foremost on how compatible you are on one hand and your ability to manage the areas of incompatibility on the other.

Ending a relationship should always be the last resort in any relationship, before reaching that end one thing should have led to the other and the couples or partners involved in such relationship might have been seeing the hand writing on the walls that the relationship is heading toward a brick wall.

However, since any marital relationship is a vow that was made initially between couple to be together till death do them part, certain last minute effort should still be made to know whether the relationship could still be restored. In order to do this, the couple may try asking, answering or discussing some questions either individually or together as the situation may permit, but should have it at the back of their mind that when it comes to matters of the heart, only honesty can do the magic. They should forget about asking about the 'love' word.. We all know that if you have been in a relationship for a while, saying "I love you" can become a habit instead of a feeling.

They should just put all the cards on the table... if the person you are ending a relationship with feels the same way about ending it (and they just might), they can move straight to step 2, if things work out fine, good .But, if not they can part and go their separate ways... but if either party is clueless to the upcoming end, such that they may feel hurt, no matter how the break up happens. Then, they can try step 1 individually and if satisfied, step 2 could be discussed together. Anyone can make the first move here    

            Step 1

Is this what you really want?

Would your life be better or worse without this person?

Would you regret it?

Step 2

Do you think our relationship is working out well? Or are you happy with how things are with us?

What do you think are the problems?

            What are those things we should be doing that we are presently not doing?

Do you think we can have a second chance?

Are you willing to try to make this work?

            What about the Children? (If any)        

 If we were to break up could we still be friends?

Some schools of thought believe that there may not be any right question to ask if you are considering ending a relationship, as it may not be easy to have this type dialogue between couples that are about going there separate ways, they are of the opinion that it sounds like an exit survey and nobody in such circumstances will be willing to take it. On the contrary, I believe it could still work out if the couples observe the signs early enough and still believe that there may be room for improvement.

Lastly, listen to your heart before you tell him/her goodbye.

Tags: Relationship Dating Divorce Shania Twain Divorce



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Viewing 1 - 2 out of 2 Comments

From: ashy5six
10/07/2008 15:27:39

DebraP,


 


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From: DebraP
08/13/2008 11:14:22

I think this is an excellent post.  If couples would ask the first two questions in step two once in a while, maybe even once a month, there might never be a divorce.  Or at least if there was, each would know they'd given it their best efforts to try to work things out.

Not so long ago, my marriage reached a point where I had to say, you have changed and I have changed, both of us dramatically and I am not happy with the way things are between us.  I do not wish to live like this and have considered leaving.  We have to learn to be together as the new people we are and to work on things if I am to stay.  We agreed to enter this new phase and that is where we are now. 

Many people I know how changed very dramatically as a result of spiritual growth or awakening.  We are not the same people we were.

And if one has awakened and the other has not, it is even more difficult.

This can throw relationships which were based on old patterns into a tail spin.  In some cases we need to snip the threads that bind these relationships together, if they are negative and draining.  

But I think that whatever we choose we should respect the other person enough to give them a chance. 

And if the choice is to leave, to do it in the kindest way possible.

Debra

    








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